Saturday, August 20, 2016

Anger Management







































It's time, time for the race I love to hate. This year, has extra incentive because the timing conflicts with my hometown race. Even though part of my says go defend your title, the torture that this race inflicts on me wins out. To the woods we go.

This race was going to be all about redemption this year. Last year's finish still leaves a sour taste in my mouth, and I don't like it. Waiting for the start, found myself getting very irritated at myself for having redemption as my primary goal, by not putting anywhere close to the effort needing to ensure that would happen. Something happened this summer and I lost almost all motivation to work. The weather has been awful and that's my primary excuse, but really it just comes down to probably doing too much earlier in the year, which has only burnt me out. The more I thought about it, the more mad I got at myself. How old am I again?

As I'm having my little tempter tantrum, found out that based on my bib, somehow I got placed in the second wave. My simple tantrum went full on nuclear. Knowing that I didn't put forth the training to ensure a better finish is now compounded by the fact of being in the second wave. On a road race, this wouldn't make any difference at all because it's all about the chip time, which is the same here as well, but this being a tail passing is at the mercy of the terrain and the person in front. All I can envision is being stuck behind people and having to spend tons of extra energy getting around them that I now had no chance to earn my redemption.

By the time it was time to start the second wave, picture my head, bright red, opening up to release steam "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!" like a teapot! There was 15 minutes between starts. Didn't count anybody that started in my wave, but at about the two mile mark, I began catching and passing people from the other wave. Two, four, five, seven, nine. Some were curious and heard the Anger Train coming and moved out of the way. Most didn't. Then it became tactical calculating when to spend energy to dodge by blazing a new path, slowing down to wait for a wider section, or fighting the urge to push them down.

I do love running and there is something about this trail run that I especially enjoy. Physically, I know I was under-trained, but the anger provided some much needed fuel. Fifteen, twenty, thirty. Sometime after thirty people passed, I stopped counting. By this point enough people were passed that I was capable of catching. Mile wise, it was probably about mile Ten in the most difficult section of the rolling hills. Honestly, there was a bit of surprise that I made it this far with my lack of training. Either the anger evaporated, or maybe the anger fuel was on empty, but I could feel myself getting tired with a surge of don't care anymore. Proof of that mentality, first time ever peeing during a race. Oh and I don't mean stopping and taking care of business. Yes, you the reader are going to get treated to all the details! Choosing an incline made the most sense, so next big hill, shorts pulled to the side and away she goes. Now, for my first attempt at something like this, I think I pulled it off like a pro. For the most part very accurate, nicely timed, and only slight over spray on one leg. Top of the hill, finished, slide the shorts back and back in the game without hardly even a pace change. You the reader, curious about which leg? What I did after? Did I tell any of my team they were riding with somebody who peed on their leg? Maybe someday.

Did I pass my Anger Management class? Hard to say. Crossing the line, it wasn't much, but I did improve on last year's time. Winning does solve almost all problems. Being in wave two, figured there was zero chance I'd be able place, yet somehow ended up first in my age group. Ultimately, still wanted a much better time, but being forced to stress over something that was completely out of my control and fighting through it, I'll take as a successful lesson. When in doubt, take a run in the woods sometime, that's my high dollar therapy solution. Might not fix all the problems, but it will tire you out to not care as much.